Where do I go from here?

     During our Good Friday service we were given the chance, as a visual illustration, to write what separates us from the Love and Power of God onto a piece of cloth that represents the veil. 

     I wrote two words on my piece of cloth, “inadequacy” and “qualifications.” I wrote them on the veil and tore that little piece of red cloth and set it in the offering basket at a broken offering to my God, to consume and remove from me.

     When I wrote those words, I very much expected to be in conflict with them. Giving your Humanity and what separates you from God a name, tends to create conflict in your spirit in order to remove those barriers from your life. I don’t find myself in conflict with pride, lust, or gluttony and sometimes I do wish I was. However, my separation from God, and everything else for that matter, is inadequacy, and ineligibility to do God’s work. To minister to students, to live a life with my wife. What kills me is my inadequacy. Whether it’s at work and not having proper credentials, or ministry and not having experience. 

     God created me with Himself in mind. When God began Creation, it was incomplete. In need of the perfection to complete it, to make it good. So God set in motion the series of events that will eventually lead to the reunification of Creation to Himself, through Jesus Christ. I understand that I am incomplete and in need of perfection to intervene in my life. That in all my “goodness," I can never be deserving of a life with God.

     This paltriness leaches itself into other parts of my life. I find myself at odds with...myself. I never graduated from “real” college. I don’t have pieces of paper that signify myself as someone “qualified” to perform ministry and the acts that are associated with it. Sometimes when it comes to fighting for what I believe in, in order to see the Kingdom of God established on the Earth. As a young man in the body of Christ, I know that I will have to face adversary through out my stint in leadership within the Church. However, one tool designed to save me, instead sometimes cripples me to the point of laying down. 

     Moses had his speech problem, Jacob had his past to contend with, Paul had Saul the list goes on, I have my lack of credentials (human papers). Through all of this I understand and have to know, that in order for the world to come back into alignment with God, there needs to be conflict. There has to be someone who is “not qualified” to step up and have tough conversations, take leadership and lead individuals towards Christ. 

     My name is Ryan Hansen, I am called to the Ministry of Jesus Christ, in order to spread, show and give the Love that has so redeemed me. Whether I am afflicted in ever way, perplexed, persecuted, or struck down. I will gird my loins and carry on. Pray for me and my wife, I’m getting back on that horse. 

• Inadequacy
• Qualifications

Do you remember how old you were when you became an adult?

How rebellious is it to be a Christian?

     I am a 25 years young man in a church that is constantly in growing pangs. These aren't always bad things, they expand and contract the Church.

     My biggest struggle is to find my place in this Church. Paul wrote in 1 Corinthians 12:12-27; about the Church being a body, and every part having it's place, just like body parts. I know I am being built for super cool things; my goal is to figure out what things I have been built for. I know where I'm called and I also know where I am.

     This issue isn't a new one; but it's not like this issue hasn't been addressed. At some point an individual should take on their responsibility and transition into their role as an adult. Given today's culture, the age of transition is in the 20's. This age is a difficult one, forget the teens the twenties are where it's at. I feel like unless a church specializes in the 20 something's then it's hard for these brothers and sisters to find authentic community, in a body that caters to families and elders. Twenty somethings are those that have no family of their own, too old to be young and too young to be old enough. 

     As has been mentioned before, that the twenties are where each individually finds his or herself and really makes their relationship with Christ their own. So in these years, there is such a wide variety of walks and maturity levels. It would seem to be a daunting group to take on and disciple. In Acts, which tells us the history of the church, I would assume the Apostles some of which still had the memories of Christ still fresh in their mind. Were sent out to sow the seeds of what we reap today. 

     Each individual in Christ is part of something bigger than themselves. This body that we are inducted into is more important that our relationship with our friends, family and world. I find it funny that Jesus calls us to be outside of mainstream culture so that we can influence mainstream culture, so we did it; we ejected the church from mainstream culture and made our own bubble, with it's own mainstream, underground and indie subcultures. The problem is we brought along the same unhealthy habits and problems that the world had. Some of these little plagues are problems with our human nature, and thus can creep into our church life.

     Can one say that the church is plagued with the same problems that the world is? The answer is yes, and this is something that I, as a young person, am figuring out. Problems that plague my peers, plague me.  My struggle as a young adult in the body of Christ is finding my place. My role in my church. Until recently I have lived in the future, my career was in the future tense, my marriage is in the future tense... I'm coming to an era of life where everything that was going to happen is starting to happen. I'm ready to start taking on my roles in the Church. My personality is taking shape to start taking responsibility. I'm excited. I have my fears and I have my doubts, but I'm ready to take them on.

     My name is Ryan Hansen, I am a young adult in the body of Christ, looking to take on my role as a leader.